Friday, April 24, 2015

The Damn Newsletter: Reflections of a Quarter Century...10 years later

Greetings and Salutations,

Well this weekend...Sunday to be exact...I will be celebrating the 35th anniversary of my birth on Earth.  So it got me to thinking.  10 years ago I did a newsletter called the "Reflections of a Quarter Century" where I compiled a list of lessons learned.  So it only makes sense on the eve of the eve of my birthday, I revisit the concept.  



But first...




Here's a review of the lessons learned 10 years prior (I will spare you the entire couple of newsletters where they originated)

1)      To Thine on self be true- I never really knew how important this was until recently.  You have a lot of people who claim to know what is best for you.  People have opinions on what school you should attend, what occupation you should have, and even what person you should be with, but at the end of the day you have to do it for yourself.  (That sounds familiar… former newsletter title?!)


2) You gotta learn to live with regrets- Self-explanatory (Another former newsletter topic…I know I have great perspective)
  

3) Only listen to advice of people who have earn the right to give it- If you do run into a situation that you need advice, this is a good tip to remember.  Why would you accept advice from people you wouldn't trust to water your plants?!  We all have friends but sometimes you have to use your own judgment or the judgment of your most trusted people.  Anyone else just won't do!!! 


4) A little niceness goes a long way and too much will kill you- I know from experience this lesson all too well.  I will spare you my tragedies on this newsletter but I will say this, PEOPLE WILL TAKE YOUR KINDNESS FOR WEAKNESS!!!  Sometimes they do it unintentionally but it still happens.  I can't say you need to go out and be a stingy but you have to have a balance or you will spend years of your life doing so much for others without even knowing what makes you happy.  (Wow, that hit close to home)


5) Follow your Dreams- I can't stress this one enough. I see so many times people who just settle.  I am here to tell you, DON'T SETTLE ON ANYTHING!!!  Why would you sell yourself short doubting that you can't do it?  A little hard work ain't hurt nobody! (Excuse the grammar but I am emphasizing a point)  I know some of you people don't even settle for what they give you a fast food place, ("I want anything but meat and bread cut in half" or "Could you put the Baja sauce on the lettuce and not on the meat?) so why should you settle in life?


6) If wearing your heart on your sleeve, it will get dirty- If I had a dollar for every time someone laughed at something that I was starting, creating, or just plain out excited about, I could buy Halle Berry, literally. (Surprisingly I got it the most who was a poster child for wearing their heart on their sleeve) I will never let anyone's negative comments stop me.  Hateration is always around.  They hated on Einstein, Edison, Dr. King, and shoot even on Jay-z.  So any one that wants to hate, bring it on.  I will even invite you to my VH1 Driven show, so you can hate on me there!!!








Now here's what I know a decade later (it will be bullet points, I promise)

·         Just because I write lessons on a screen, doesn't mean I learn them.  I'm still struggling on every last one of those lessons listed above.

·         Depression is a real, real disease.  Most people who haven't gone through it just think you're sad have no idea who to deal with someone who is going through it.  Don’t worry about the people who don’t get it…focus on you.

·         I used to listen to music to look for the new big thing so I could tell everybody I Christopher Columbus that (So to speak).  Now I listen to what I like and don't give a rat's ass about what people think about it. 



(i.e. Taylor Swift’s Blank Space)



·         Kids truly change your life.  As a parent you decide if it's a positive change or a negative one.  I tell people all the time that Brooklyn saved my life.  However I have seen parents treat kids like an inconvenience.  *shrug*

·          Confidence shouldn't come from looks or muscles or money.  It comes from within. Yeah...it's cliché but I am just now figuring it out.

·         For 35 years I have been my own worst enemy.  I constantly get in my way and have defeated myself 90% of the time.  I am my nemesis.  I should try to be friends with myself...I'm such an easy person to love.

·         And finally...you never know the impact that you make on someone's life.  It's always the little things.  A simple wave, a friendly smile, a "I'm just checking on you" text. Life is about the little things...always remember that...




But those are just my thoughts...right or wrong...just what I'm feeling at the time!!!!

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